“I fuckin have terrible headache”
This morning she surprised me with a message “It’s over. I need this week to be just alone” I understood, she finally dropped him. She said that actually he dumped her again. Again means for 3rd, 4th or 5th time, not sure anymore. As I was out of city, we couldn’t meet that day to discuss things face to face. Obviously she needed it, but we could just talk over the phone. In her voice she was very happy, relieved, waiting to hug me same time I would arrive later that evening. She wanted to start it over, reset it and I felt she was serious this time, lighten and ready. Rest of the afternoon we were in good mood, exchanging positive messages in hope for better time.
As closing to the evening, she indicated headache, still far from my arrival planned for around 11pm. Rest of the evening was related to that headache, text messages became sparse. When I landed she wasn’t there. I trusted that the headache kicked her off and she went to bed early. Unfortunately by that time I didn’t know anything about new actor called Sir John.
Saturday Morning, Im Devastated, and broken. I sent Mr. Grey a message that its over between me and Giuseppe, however I was feeling down and just want to isolate myself and shut the world out.
I need a break, I need time to be alone, just be with myself for a week to think things over. I don’t know what I will do now, things didn’t went well as I expected.
After Giuseppe broke up with me that night, Though Im hurting but I tried to compose myself and stayed strong. I’m worried and stress again, having no job, with unsettled debts, and even more heartbroken for several times with the ups and downs relationship with Giuseppe. I’m fed up, totally exhausted and started to have headache, migraine I should say.
That same day, I received a message from Sir John, my boss. He just came back from vacation, he wasn’t around when I handed over my resignation, now he’s back in the city, he wanted me to come over to his place. I told him I have severe headache, I cant drive, I am not feeling well. I gave him all the excuses I could think of just not to go on his place. “Come here, or I will give up on you” He is talking as if we are in relationship when we are not! “If you will not come, I will finish with you” I know what he wants from me, and the fact that Im still holding his company visa, I needed his visa to stay in Sin City until I will manage to find a new employer, making him upset is the worst I can do and it’ll be the end. I really don’t have choice but to obey what he asked, So I drove to his place and you can imagine now what happen next between us. I wanted to leave as soon as he’s done with me, But he didn’t allow me to leave as it was already late and I had a headache. Again, I don’t have choice but to sleep over in his place.
I woke up 6am, saying Goodbye to Sir John, he handed over me some cash for my makeup, he keep his promise that he will still support with my makeup class. I drove home crying, feeling disgusted with myself as I have to go through all this experience just to survive for some amount of cash. I shouldn’t have done this, I’m fucked up, I messed up. I’m miserable, what’s the difference between me and a prostitute when I’m sleeping over for money? Technically, that’s how it is the situation with Sir John.